Since Covid cut my vacation short and “sent me to my room” I’ve had some time to think. It seems like a lot of times when we are less energetic – maybe we’re sick, maybe we’re blue or our depression is popping up again – we feel like we have to tough it out, find something to do while we can’t be doing the things we normally do.  We don’t want to fall behind and we certainly don’t want to disappoint anyone else. After all, aren’t we supposed to be “living our best lives”? But what if slowing down is doing just that? What if it’s not only ok to not be ok, it’s actually kinda useful?

A teacher once reminded me that we are human beings, not human doings. It may sound trite but really think about that for a minute. When we meet new people at a party, we generally open with, “what do you do?” not, “what are your thoughts on …”, or “what feeling brings you the most joy?”. In school we are meant to figure out what we want to do with our lives. Very rarely does the focus fall onto who we want to be.

Of course we need to “do” things to survive and to thrive but shouldn’t those things be driven by the ultimate goal of being the best version of ourselves? Just like athletes that are “in the zone” when they are playing at their highest level, wouldn’t everything we do be even better if we were fully aligned with our best, most authentic self? There needs to be a balance, a sweet spot, and how do we know where that is if we never stop doing things long enough to find out?

Our bodies are great teachers right? They tell us what they need, it’s just up to us to listen. So maybe if our bodies need some down time they are telling us the balance is off? Maybe instead of berating ourselves for needing a little rest, or calling ourselves weak, we decide to be grateful for the chance to find our center of gravity again?

How though? For me, the first thing I remember is that emotions are that and only that – they have no power until we give them some. They come and go, they don’t last forever. You can just notice them and let them pass (easier said than done I know but keep practicing, once you get to a place where it starts to come naturally, it’s a whole new world).

After allowing whatever it is to have its moment and move on, it’s time to refresh. This can look different for everyone – maybe it’s taking 20 deep breaths or napping (if you’re lucky), maybe it’s making healthy food, or journaling. It could be calling your therapist, or snuggling with a pet. When you are physically capable, some movement can get the good energy flowing again – a slow walk outside, a gentle yoga flow or some stretches. You’ll know when you find what works for you. There’s no need to force it, just go with your gut.

It’s amazing how much easier it is to do all the things when we’ve been given a moment to remember who we are and why we do them in the first place. Sometimes the hardest, most admirable thing to do is to just be.