Just in time for the holidays – it’s your very own get out of chaos free card! Who says you have to run yourself ragged checking off shopping lists, decorating anything that doesn’t move, attending each and every holiday opportunity in your town and surrounding area? Who made that up? Does it bring you joy? If it does, have a blast! It didn’t for us.

I always loved how LM and fam handled holidays – they were making it matter before that was a trend!

And my mom was doing that before any of us. When I was a kid my mom made the holidays magic. Delicious food, cookies galore, beautiful presents wrapped for royalty, music, soft light and music set the tone. As the family grew and grandkids arrived, she decided to give herself a break so she could enjoy all the warmth and love without falling asleep standing up. So instead of the Christmas Eve 4 course feast, we ordered pizzas! And it was … MAGIC. She knew that when her kids looked back they would remember the feelings – warmth and love and joy much more than the itineraries.

I am all about people doing the parts of holidays that they love. It’s not so much about celebrating or not celebrating traditions, it’s about managing the traditions in a way that fits your family. Because if everyone is running around crazy under the guise of giving your kids an amazing childhood, I would argue the point is getting lost. Mom and Dad stressing about holidays and resenting all the “have tos” is a completely unnecessary generational cycle.

So after having our eyes opened to the wonderful world of HAPPY holidays, i.e. holidays on OUR terms – the first thing I decided to cut back on was excessive baking. I asked my kids to tell me their favorite cookie and I’d make sure to make those. I did NOT ask my husband because I KNOW his answer – Spritz. Those freaking Spritz – the flour at high altitude never worked, they stuck to the cookie press – and I ended up swearing enough to make the devil blush. So NO to Spritz for me. Fortunately his mother is one of the sweetest women in the world and sends him a box for his birthday. Food is a love language for her.

Now, if you’ve trained your kids right, they will answer the cookie question with “store bought slice & bake cookies”! Score! Everyone wins. Clearly food is not MY love language. That said, music very much IS. So I make sure there are candles and hymns and carols softly playing at all times. It’s about what brings you and your loved ones closer.

I feel like chaos has been way too normalized in our lives. And the holidays amp that up like no other time. It’s in all the modern stories; rushing around busy busy busy – making sure to get that early release of the favorite toy of the year, making 12 meals for a long weekend of visitors. Schlepping toddlers and pets and suitcases overflowing with presents on highways or in the air; a small convoy of chaos to add to the overwhelming rush of activity and emotion already converging at Grandma’s. How could it possibly be the holidays without it?

Oh and ps, you should really relax and enjoy your family – if you’re doing all prescribed chaos but not slowing down and enjoying it all then, well nice try but you still failed. It’s all nuts and I say no thank you!

Wanna join me but still feel the societal pressure? Well consider this your permission slip for your own “hassle free holiday”, enjoy!